Why you should quit
Our culture hates quitters. Just a few days ago, I watched a reel on Instagram that was recycled from TikTok, with an “inspirational” video set to audio from Kevin Hart talking about why we should never quit.
The thing is, that’s horrible advice. We should ALL quit more often. Take Kevin Hart himself, for example. When Kevin Hart and his ex-wife filed for divorce in 2010, that was quitting. And it was most likely a good thing! They cited irreconcilable differences, and he has since (happily, from the looks of it) remarried. Kevin Hart chose to quit instead of staying in a relationship that was no longer working. As he should! As we all should.
Earth is estimated to be 4.5 billion years old, but the oldest recorded human only lived to 122. That isn’t even a drop in the bucket of time. Most of us won’t live that long, but I can tell you one thing for sure. Our lives are entirely too short to commit to things we don’t enjoy, that don’t grow, advance, or fulfill us, simply because society tells us that quitting is bad.
When I was 8 years old, I decided that I would go to Spelman College. Soon thereafter, I committed to growing up to be a lawyer. I joined my high school mock trial team, did law firm and court internships in college, then went to Harvard Law School. After practicing law for almost 7 years, I quit. Why? Because I hated it. I tried several fields of law and worked as a law firm associate, a law clerk, and a staff attorney at a local non-profit. I did pro bono work on the side. Sometimes, I enjoyed the discreet cases I worked on, and with some of my clients, I was proud to be able to help them in moments of extreme need, but overall, I hated being a lawyer. I hated my law firm (which felt like a hostile place to work as a Back woman with a conscience), I hated the strictures of legal writing, I hated many of my colleagues who were privileged little shits or spineless cowards, I hated the criminal justice system that was built on the oppression of Black people – I hated it all. So I quit. I started designing the life that I wanted to live, which included a new company, role, home, everything. And the joy of that decision to quit is immeasurable. Who cares that I spent decades with my eye on the prize of being a lawyer? Who cares that I spent 3 years and several hundreds of thousands of dollars to train as a lawyer (I’m still hurt about my student loan bill, but I digress)? Why would I spend more time dedicating my life to something I hate just because of the time I’d already spent doing it? How does that make sense?
Quit that job. Quit that marriage. Quit that city, state, or even country. Quit that friendship. Quit that relationship. Quit that book (blasphemy, I know, but if the book isn’t good, hunny, put it down!). Quit that organization. Quit ALL that shit that you hate, that drains you, that ages you, that makes you feel small and insecure. If you aren’t hurting anyone by quitting, but you’re hurting yourself by doubling down, baby, what is you doin?! Because, at the end of it all, at the end of however many years you are granted on this earth, what will you get for having chosen to suffer instead of quitting and doing what moves you? I highly doubt that they have gold stars at the pearly gates. So yea. Quit. Often.
